Top 10 Games with stupidly cool weapons
The selection of weapons can make or break any half-decent action game, and we’ve played them all. Join X-ONE as we find the ultimate killing tools
1. Energy Sword
Game: Halo: Combat Evolved | Developer: Bungie | Release: 2001
Halo’s Energy Sword possessed an effortless sci-fi cool that few videogame weapons achieve. While it was only something to admire from afar in the first instalment, it was little wonder that Bungie placed it in the hands of players come sequel time and Halo 2 demonstrated just what an awesome blade it was when we got to jump into the shoes of the Arbiter. Not only that but it also spawned one of the fiercest multiplayer killing tools in gaming history, launching combatants towards each other for an instant kill. If you want to kill quickly and efficiently, and look good while doing it, this is the one.
2. Gravity Gun
Game: Half-Life 2 | Developer: Valve | Release: 2007
In what could’ve easily been a gimmicky device used to solve a few environmental puzzles, Valve’s seminal Half-Life 2 presented players with the Gravity Gun – one of the finest death instruments in the history of the first-person shooter genre. All of a sudden gamers weren’t confined to just pulling a virtual trigger and watching a virtual bullet crack some virtual zombie skull. You could pick up, well, virtually anything. Suddenly the world became full of potential weapons and your imagination was the trigger. When it comes down to ingenuity, Valve is still the best in the business.
Game: Devil May Cry 4 | Developer: Capcom | Release: 2008
Devil May Cry has some pretty badass weapons but Pandora is pretty much the Swiss Army Knife of supernatural divine weaponry. Dante’s suitcase of wonders can transform into pretty much any weapon and deal with whatever monumental monster that must be cast back into Lucifer’s dungeon. It’s the level of versatility and portability that makes Dante’s compact luggage such a devilish treat to wield, not to mention entirely practical when it comes to doing your daily demon slaying. Whether you need a long-range missile, a heavy-duty machine gun or something slightly subtler, Pandora has it all.
4. Mr Toots
Game: Red Faction: Armageddon | Developer: Volition | Release: 2011
There’s something stomach-churningly appalling about the treatment of Mr. Toots in Red Faction: Armageddon. While we can’t question the sheer might of his destructive rainbow excrement, pulling Toots’ tail and unleashing a beam of pure wonder and magic transforms the diminutive unicorn’s expression, revealing it to be nothing but a painful ordeal. There really isn’t a weapon that can match Toots’ destructive bum-beam in Armageddon, but is it worth the excruciating agony that we’re putting the mystical beast through? Yes. Yes it is.
5. Experimental Mirv
Game: Fallout 3 | Developer: Bethesda | Release: 2008
The Fat Man in Fallout 3 fires a miniature nuke at opponents, causing instant death in a satisfying mushroom of flame and smoke. Apparently that finite method of ending one’s life wasn’t enough firepower for some. Hence the Experimental MIRV was created, a gun that fires a total of eight mini-nukes, eviscerating all known life in the area (and for many years to come, we imagine). It’s a little tricky to find in Fallout 3, but, rest assured, having this big red button of doom swinging from your arm will bring swift death to everyone.
6. Tactical Nuke
Game: COD: MW2 | Developer: Infinity Ward | Release: 2009
While we’re on the subject of nuclear weapons, leave it to the Call Of Duty franchise – perhaps the most outrageously bombastic action series to ever grace gaming – to one-up the competition with its devastating multiplayer killstreak. Yes, it may be controversial, but the Tactical Nuke is a badge of honour among the multiplayer battlefield, awarded once you’ve racked up 25 consecutive kills. It’s a game ender. Nuking the entire arena and bringing death not just to your enemies but to yourself and your team. When it comes to winning a game of Team Deathmatch, you might as well do it in style.
7. Foam Finger
Game: Dead Space 2 | Developer: Visceral Games | Release: 2011
If you were a fan of Saturday night television from yesteryear where the likes of Jet, Ace and Wolf ruled the arena in Gladiator, then you’ll be familiar with foam fingers. Audience members would thrust these novelty items into the air in correlation with some spectacular event, signalling their pleasure and/or agreement with what has occurred. They are not, by tradition, a peripheral clothing item that unleashes a mighty gust of power capable or severing multiple limbs from a body. That is, unless you’re playing Dead Space 2. Because they do that in Dead Space 2. Go play Dead Space 2.
Game: Doom 3 | Developer: id Software | Release: 2005
We all know what ‘BFG’ stands for, right? No, not a big, friendly giant, the other one. This hulking firearm has become the staple of id Software’s Doom series and it’s the quintessence of what makes the series so damned fun to play after all these years – brawny, destructive warfare. Not only that but it set the bar for all other shooters that followed in its footsteps. Whatever Doom 4 turns out to be after years stuck in a development tailspin, one thing is for certain: players will be roaming through the corridors blasting hellspawn into gloop using one of the most satisfying weapons ever created.
9. M-920 Cain
Game: Mass Effect 2 | Developer: BioWare | Release: 2010
What is it with game developers and nuclear bombs? Well, BioWare certainly wanted to get in on the devastation game when it came to the middle part of the excellent sci-fi series, Mass Effect 2, which upped the drama and action substantially. The M-920 Cain unleashes a devastating nuclear missile that can take down any foe in one shot. Actually, that’s not quite true. It takes two shots to take down a Reaper. Yeah, it’s that powerful. Grab enough upgrades and ammunition for this beast and you’ll have yourself the most powerful weapon in the entire galaxy at your fingertips.
10. Mk2 Lancer
Game: Gears Of War | Developer: Epic Games | Release: 2006
You remember that bit in Resident Evil 4 when that hulking monstrosity comes barrelling out of a shed wielding a chainsaw and rips Leon Kennedy in half? Well, in Gears Of War you’re that hulking monstrosity. There was something that just worked about the assault rifle and chainsaw combination in Epic’s Gears series, the weightiness to the gunplay matched with the satisfyingly gruesome carnage produced by hacking a locust to pieces with the gun’s mounted whirling blade. The result makes for one of the most viscerally satisfying and wonderfully absurd weapons to ever grace and Xbox game.